Dr. Anne Malatt,an ophthalmologist, had gently indicated a few months earlier it could be time to consider the removal of the thickening cataracts from my eyes. Following cataract surgery, the final check for the visual function of the new lenses was complete and the journey home once again on the public transport light rail system, gave me the opportunity to reflect upon this latest little medical adventure of mine.
What was it that was being revealed to me? What lay behind experiencing ‘blurred’ vision or even having had to wear prescription eyeglasses since a teenager? Had I been viewing life in reaction rather than response?
There had only been a few events in this life that I had knowingly recoiled from in fear, trepidation or disbelief, wanting desperately for the things that I saw or was aware of to be different, although I have had difficulty in accepting the horror of the news events of the world, subjecting myself to feeling the pain and supposed injustice personally.
At that time, I did not have the understanding that the energy of all expression flows through us constantly, leaving me contemplating whether we had at some point a choice in allowing these unloving energies to take hold. The constant thoughts and the enquiring mind also saw me wondering whether we all had indeed a part to play in some way through our past choices and behaviours and the current state of play we are all experiencing.
Some may see this cataract surgery as commonplace, not uncommon at all. However, how many of us would choose to take the time to look within a little more carefully to gauge what it really means energetically?
Was there is a deeper understanding behind this condition for me to explore? I am slowly learning to leave the ‘catacombs of the mind’ and connect with me, listening more to my body as it clearly lets me know of the disregard of many of my previous choices in life.
Was I listening to my body when I pushed through doggedly to complete the ‘to do’ lists? Was I endeavouring to justify or prove that I was at least loveable at some level, as someone who could always be relied upon to say ‘yes’ even if it was detrimental to my physical and delicate womanly body?
There have been many instances of ‘doing’ of physical tasks just to be noticed, acknowledged, recognised and ultimately accepted as worthy of existence. Where was this woman in livingness – where had I been? Had I been lost in a consciousness of an indoctrination, blindly following the ideals and belief systems of a wayward humanity?
As grace would have it, eventually I listened to my inner heart and found that still place of connection to Soul.
What a revelation was embraced in that moment. My own perception offered me a knowing which was confirmed and deepened a few days later, thanks to a very wise counsellor, Natalie Benhayon, when we discussed the relevance of this eye condition . . .
Was it possible that in my many lives there had been a build-up, a thickening/pollution, that was blocking my ‘true’ sight – the inner signs of what we feel and sense intuitively – perhaps even to the point of ‘not wanting to see’ and perhaps 'harbouring pictures of how one would prefer life to be'?
So much to ponder on . . .
My journey home on the light rail was nearing its end and I felt a wave of deep appreciation not only of the skill of the surgeon and her caring team, but also for the healing opportunity, of being given another chance to look at life more clearly and froma different perspective, one with a greater sense of seeing beyond the obvious temporal view.
What is it that I did not really want to see but instead chose to cover the Truth with a film to dull the sight? Is it possible that ‘cataracts’ are a result of being in resistance to what is clearly seen and felt?
Did the cataract surgery offer me a remarkable clearing and healing opportunity, not just on a physical level, but an opportunity to heal old ways of seeing life and people that have not been true and whole?
As I sit at my computer writing this blog with a new lens in each eye I am astounded at this gift of newly gained in-sight.
Roberta H., Australia
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